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If you want a different result in your life, do the opposite of what you normally do

opposite day

I would bet my best cowgirl boots that you…want something.

Maybe you’ve wanted it for awhile and it aches in your belly or your chest as a longing to have. Maybe it’s a new desire that that is slowly (then quickly) revealing itself to you. Maybe it feels exciting to want it. Maybe it feels like heartbreak.

The act of wanting is such a pure thing. You get a feeling, a desire, and your body and your mind says “YES. THAT.”

But then something else happens right after that.

You doubt. You wonder “how am I ever going to get there…it seems so impossible.” Or “what if I change my mind?” or “I’m not good enough/smart enough/pretty enough/deserving enough to have that” or “what if I end up doing it and it still isn’t the answer?” Or you think “I’m not allowed to have that” whether that’s a self-imposed decision or one you picked up from your family or peer group.

And then at this point, you have a choice. To follow the “YES. THAT” feeling, or the “it seems so impossible” one. I wish I had better statistics, but from what I’ve seen, most of us spend a lot of our lives wanting “YES. THAT” but actually making choices that align more with “it seems so impossible.”

And then we all wonder why we don’t feel happy and fulfilled or have the life we truly want. We wonder why “it’s not happening for me.” And we then use that thought to prove that it is, in fact, so impossible.

But that’s not true. It’s not the case. Instead, the truth is that you’re getting exactly the thing you’re putting your attention and making choices toward. If you choose options aligned with “that’s so impossible” you’ll keep finding that it’s impossible.

So you might now be all like “Ummmm…yeaaaaah…ok so what do I do about that?”

And the answer is actually really really simple. And it is something that I was reminded of yesterday during an office hours chat with one of my members of the Wildheart Revolution.

And it reminds me of a game that we all used to play when we were kids. Remember “Opposite Day?” It’s where everything you said and did was to be the opposite. So if I told my mom “I really love it when you ground me…OPPOSITE DAY!” I am basically saying that I absolutely do NOT love it when she grounds me.

Well, the answer to the above question is similar to this game…

If you are finding the same undesirable result in your life and not getting what you’re wanting, then do the opposite of what you normally do. (TWEET THIS!)

So for example if what you’re really wanting is a successful and popular blog, but instead of writing you find a million excuses why you can’t (including drinking wine with your roommates), then the opposite of that would be to make the choice to write instead of drink.

If what you want is an amazingly beautiful, mind-blowing relationship, but you never leave the house and go talk to people, then the opposite of that would be to get out more.

The trick of the trade is to make all your decisions aligned with the thing you truly want, and by doing that, you make it happen.

You down to practice playing opposite day this week? This is how it works:

1) Discover what you’re unhappy with right this minute (boyfriend, job, kids, etc)

2) Think about what you would “normally” do in that particular situation

3) Do the opposite of that

4) See what happens

So I’m curious…what is something you’ve been wanting? And how much are your choices and behaviors aligned with that? And if they’re not aligned, what would be the “opposite”?

I’d love to hear from you so if you’d like to join in on the convo, hope on over to the comments below the blog and chime in and if you need help working through this exercise, don’t hesitate to reach out.

Have a great weekend! (not opposite day)
Sally

 

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3 Responses to If you want a different result in your life, do the opposite of what you normally do

  1. Tarsila says:

    Sally, you’re the kick I needed!
    Tracing my plans and actively working on them IS FANTASTIC!
    Re-programmibg our habits/brains to get to where our hearts want most is simply a matter of taking action. Thank you SO SO SO SO SO MUCH!

    • Sally Hope says:

      Ahhhh so glad it resonated lady!! And you’re SO right. It is about action. One foot in front of the other. You got this. XO

  2. Amanda says:

    I love this article and all those questions run through my mind at some point during the day. Maybe this shows how deep in these thoughts I am, but what do I do the opposite of my job that I hate? Sally I feel so stuck in my day job like I am never going to be able to leave until I make money at my business because I have a family to support and bills to pay! UGH…I’m doing it!!!!

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