September 17th, 2013
How To Stop Feeling Bad (Right Now)
Do you ever experience painful thoughts or feelings?
(Okay, that’s a rhetorical question. If you’re human, the answer is, “Heallz yes!”)
Here’s the thing, though.
If you’re feeling bad right now, it’s only because you’re living somewhere that doesn’t even exist.
What do I mean?
Well, imagine a painful situation. Perhaps you just had a breakup. What are your thoughts surrounding that?
I imagine that some of your thoughts are remembering when times were good. Or maybe you’re replaying the breakup conversation in your head (ouch).
Or maybe you think to the future and imagine a lonely life with you and a ton of cats. Or
you imagine that you’ll never find anyone as great as your ex.
These thoughts are all very common. But the problem with them is that none of them exist in the present moment, and all of them cause you pain.
If you want to experience less pain, the trick is to get into the present moment—which is the ONLY moment that actually exists.
If you doubt that, just try to actually live in the past, right now. Didn’t work?
Okay, now try to live in the future, right now. Can’t be done.
That’s because NOW is the only moment there is. And being here NOW is the key to stop suffering and experience peace.
Now, when I was learning this stuff, I was all like, “Great…well how the hell do I do THAT?”
And that’s why I created this video for you. In it, I share a simple trick you can use (it’s the one I use ALL the time) to help get you in the present moment when you find your mind wandering all over the place.
When you’re done watching, I love to hear your thoughts.
Do you ever find yourself “time traveling” into the past or future? Do you have a great trick to help bring yourself back into the moment?
I’d love to hear it in the comments below.
And if you want even more tricks and tips to help you carpe the hell outta your diem, join the Wildheart Revolution!
I’m cookin’ up some very exciting things in the coming months to help you live Wildheart in SO many areas of your life: relationships, business, spirituality— you name it.
Whether you’re already crushing it in life and just want that extra “oomph” that comes from personal access to a kickass coach and a community that totally gets you and supports you…
Or you feel a little lost and would love to have weekly support, coaching, inspiration, and assignments (I call them Heartwork) that’ll get you living the life you’ve been dreaming of…
There’s something for YOU in this revolution, Wildheart.
I’d love to see you there!
XOXO,
Sally
It is true.. I find myself living in the past it is from the pain and what I’ve been through. But most is from a controlling husband :/. I’ve come to realize that I am someone and you can’t change anyone theyre still living in the past which I’m the one taking the shit. So i’ve come to the conclusion I am getting my American Indian grants and I am going to school. I have tons of artistic values hidden in within side myself which I won’t look back but I am really excited for what’s ahead.. no stopping this girl!
WOW GIRL!!!! Congrats!!!!! This part felt SO resonant to me: “I have tons of artistic values hidden in within side myself which I won’t look back but I am really excited for what’s ahead.. no stopping this girl!”
Yeah…no stopping you!!!
Living in the past and future was a major problem for me. I found that establishing a daily gratitude practice helped a lot. It took my attention away from what went wrong or what is going to go wrong and focused on what is going right.
YES. I think gratitude is one of the quickest ways to get present and it’s so darn rewarding too. DOUBLE POINTS!! :) Thank you so much for your thoughts on this. You rule.
XO
You are such a badass. I love this video and I love your whole message! This video broke down the process of living in the moment so clearly, no one has ever done that for me before!
I <3 <3 <3 this!
AHHHHH! I’m so glad. Yeah the whole “live in the now” thing always confused me. I didn’t know why it was important or how to do it, but sometimes it’s more simple than we think. Thank you for your comment! XOXO
Sally-
I love this post and your video! (and of course you look be-U-tiful!)
Perfect timing for me and my bf who watched this with me and said “right on- she says some really good stuff”.
We had a sad night last night regarding some things that happened in the past (which I cannot change or erase) and we were discussing the future too… this all lead to crying myself to sleep, waking up at 3:30, slamming more Kava, going to your website to look at your schedule b/c I thought this was the most traumatic, life-turning night ever (admittedly, I was being very sensitive and dramatic). Something changed right after I went back to bed (and I’m sure the Kava helped calm me down) I just reminded myself that I won’t feel like this forever… I won’t even feel like this tomorrow and neither will my boyfriend. If I had had this calmness during our talk earlier in the evening, it would not have escalated the way it did. If I had just let go and apologized and trusted that everything in the future will go the way it is supposed to go, and if I would have stopped resisting life as it should be, I would have felt a lot more peace and a lot less upset.
Seeing your post today is a huge reminder. As my bf and I are trying to “figure things out”.. really, nothing is wrong right now. Trippy how we mess with a good thing.
Today is going well, btw. Thank you so much!! I love you Sally!! xoxo
Hey Jilly…AWESOME!! I’m so glad the video resonated with you guys and it’s adorable that you watched it together.
You’re doing great lady. These are all BIG lessons and even just recognizing them already shifts them. You mentioned having an awareness around past and present, letting go, trust/surrender, not resisting. I mean those are all the BIGGEST lessons for us all to learn.
You got this. Thank you for sharing. And have an AWESOME day. XOXOXOXOOXOX
I was really looking forward to your answer but, alas, am only half satisfied [which, be assured, is unusual ; )].
Thinking another thought can be key in some moments, having gratitude, key, in others… but what about when you’ve done all you can to put these into practice and you fall flatsters on your face (or go diving headlong into that familiar pit)? I think it’s when something inside wants out. When we bury trauma, we bury it alive. Or it’s an inner vow we once made to protect ourselves that keeps tripping us up in our present. Things like, ‘you’ll never make it,’ ‘who wants what YOU have to offer?’ need a good kick out of our sweet, vulnerable selves. Beat ’em up and tell them they will no longer have the floor.
But if they persist they’re likely more than a trite vow and connected to pain that wants out and needs a voice… our voice. ‘You’ll never make it’ could even emit from the ongoing neglect experienced at the hand of a parent (even if well-intentioned: single parent having to work two jobs, etc.) who did not give us the care or words we needed to spur us on and give us our identity as people who have a place in the world.
We’re very complex and the only ones who know what gives our negativity such energy is the wee little silenced voice inside. Give HER the floor. Let her have her say to help her release the pain that so trips up her present. We need to be good to ourselves and listen to what is crying out to be said… only then can we plan a future from a free place.
Hey Miss Tricia…
YES! I love this comment and I actually agree with you. I think there are a lot of ways to handle how we feel, and at the center of ALL of them is consciousness about what is actually happening.
When I mention “get yourself present” I don’t mean “stop feeling what you’re feeling.” I mean, pay attention to your thoughts and have an awareness about where they’re coming from. From THAT place we are able to be honest about them. Or unbury them as you say.
I don’t ever advocate shutting out the voice that needs to speak. On the contrary I think that that is the number one reason most people have so much pain…they don’t allow what’s there to be there.
So in this vid, I wasn’t advocating to shut up the voice. But rather, to have a very clear awareness of where that voice lives…in the past, or in the future, so that we can give her the floor in the present moment.
Thank you so much for your insights and feedback!!
Xo