April 23rd, 2012
Being In A Crappy Mood. And Loving Yourself Anyway.
I have to be honest. I’ve been in a real crap mood lately. Letting negative self-talk TOTALLY ruin my vibe. And it’s gotten in the way of everything. I’ve been worrying about life instead of living life. Worrying about the future, which was making it ten times harder to have an awesome one. And I’m a coach…so I know how it goes. Negative self talk = negative happiness.
So every week, Natalie and I have been doing these free coaching/advice calls. We just put out a date and a time and see who shows up. We don’t plan a curriculum. We don’t make it a big deal. We just intend that whatever shows up on the call is whatever needs to show up on the call for each person involved.
I just got off the phone from our call this week and I’m sparked more than I have been in awhile. I think I might have been coached, inadvertently, just by being on the call with the people that were there. Usually, these calls have a theme to them and by the end of today’s, seemed to be all about WILLINGNESS.
So many times, we want something, and when find it hard to get, we want to give up. Because we’re impatient. And we want it NOW. And feel like we should have it NOW. But the thing is, every single thing we have ever done in life has been a progress…a journey. We crawl then walk. We learn ABC’s and then we start writing sentences. We can’t have the latter without the former. And so why is it that we forget that when we think of our dreams? Why is it that we are so unwilling to be in the crawling stages? In the “try it out and see how it goes” stage? We are way too hard on ourselves in this way.
The only thing we know for sure is that we know nothing about what the future holds, and that things change. The best any of us can do is continue to LIVE our lives in a way that excites and sparks us. And be willing. Willing to change. Willing to surrender to the randomness of life. Willing to play for 15 people even when you want it to be thousands. Willing to do whatever it takes. Willing to love ourselves throughout it all. And willing for it to be different and perhaps better than we could have dreamed up.
So…my advice to you, and to myself is to keep dreaming. Keep living in a way that is both exciting and scary. Be willing to be out of your comfort zone. To do what it takes. To let it go. Keep seeing what you want for yourself and then be willing to let that grow. The Universe has a way of dropping things in your lap that are so beautiful and unexpected. And you might miss it if you’re too busy being all stressed out about your plan.
Willingness is a gift. And who doesn’t like presents?
What are some things you’ve been wanting to do? In what ways do you feel like you could be more “willing” in your life? What are those hidden dreams of yours? Leave a comment below and hang with me on here.
P.s. Besides…it’s pretty selfish of you to NOT live your dreams. Read about it here.
once again, you are right on target. I keep having these comparison gremlins come up, when I see others success or dreams happening, but what I forget to see is they at once crawled and had to figure it all out before they got to where they are. It just feels like I have more mistakes lately than steps up on the success ladder, but the lessons I have learned have been super crazy awesome. But you are right… we must be willing, keep dreaming and having gratitude for the learning experiences. Thanks so much for your honesty of your feelings and being such an awesome guide on this journey.
My dear…wow…I couldn’t resonate any more with what you said. It’s SO easy to be jealous of others or compare ourselves and then feel bad about it. I think it’s another form of beating ourselves up. Not loving ourselves. And looking outside instead of inward. Every beautiful step you take is exactly the right one. Don’t forget that my dear.
Thank you Sally ! I needed to read this right now :)
Let’s be happy crawlers !
Glad it resonated lady and look forward to catching up! Crawl on, fellow crawler. :)
I’m ALWAYS in the “let’s try it out and see what happens” stage. That’s pretty much how I built all of my different businesses! There isn’t anything at all like what I do with my businesses. I just said, “Well, I like fire, so let’s blaze some trails and see how it goes…”. Fortunately, it caught on, and I’m able to do all these different exciting things. Not just with SFP, but with the other branches of SFP I work with. I find it fun to do something different, and be with creative people that assist in our growth as we continue our quest in becoming a recognised name in each industry we are involved.
Of course you are!! Because you’re a badass. :)
So right Sally. The crappy days do come and it is hard to keep going on what you really want. So right now I am doing three or four rights nows to get my photographic art mving, my cross-cultural training skills honed, and live some dreams. Wanting and needing = crawling sometimes.
Cheers to the crawling phase!! Sounds like you are doing an amazing job in the building of your dreams right now. Thank you so much for sharing and being here.
On Jan. 4th of this year…I lost my job of 12 years…devastating to me, since the “buck stops with me”… I’ve had a couple of top two interviews…and ended up losing out. “Devastating”… my mortgage is due! My long-distance, long-term relationship doesn’t seem to have the spark it needs, especially now. My old dog, my constant companion and life saver of the last 13 years is nearing the end which devastates me….lots seems to be unraveling in my life and I don’t know what to do except…try, each and every day to “show up”…send out resumes, talk to people about my needs, try to hold onto hope that “the man and I can work it out from afar”…that a job works out, my bills get paid and I get a few more good months from my beautiful dog. These have been some of my darkest days in a very long time. So, I thank you for your posts, your kick ass attitude and the things that resonate with me. It gives me hope when I feel very alone. Thank you.
Miss Jeanie…my heart is with you right now. Thank you so much for sharing. And gosh…it sounds like so much is happening all at once. And what I’m so inspired by, with you, is that even though it seems that it’s raining and pouring, you’re still putting yourself out there, still showing up, and still knowing that life is ultimately good. That is not easy to do when things are feeling hard. Thank you for being with us on here and hang in there. You’re doing everything you can. Be kind to yourself and keep imagining your life being exactly what you want. Sometimes we create things in our lives that at first seem difficult, and only make sense in retrospect. Trust that this is one of those times.
After losing my job of twelve years I know exactly that pit of the stomach feeling. I sent out resumes and all that. I was lucky to land a contract job from a source I did not expect. I have not just glimmers of hope, but that feeling that I will make it. Hang in there. The crap still falls, but there is hope!…and Hope
I needed to hear this blog, I too have had some crappy days. I was trying to pinpoint the anxiety and decided it was “sympathy anxiety”. I have been helping some friends talk about some heavy stuff in their lives, breakups, abusing drugs, moving, cancer, you name it, it’s probably been brought to me lately. I’m a pretty strong person but there comes a time I feel all that pain and it creates anxiety for me and I get crunchy. What helps? For me it’s talking about me and my actions, setting boundaries and knowing I can’t save someone, and writing a list of goals, what I want to happen, and what i need to do to make it happen. Like Sally said… It’s all baby steps!
Oh girl I know what you mean. When you’re a sensitive, sweet, empathetic person, it’s hard to not take on the pain of others. Having boundaries is extremely important. And I love your list too. Good for you lady. I am so grateful to have you for a friend and get to learn from you. Life is pretty cool, eh?
I forgot to say thank you Sally and I love you!
I’m now going to practice my Ho’oponono : )