October 11th, 2012
I Will Survive. And So Will You.
One week ago, I was sitting in a friend’s apartment in Bozeman, MT, finishing up my Gratitude Post right before I was to leave town and head back to California. It was cold inside the apartment. The kind where when you get out of the shower, you dry off as fast as you can, so that you can jump right back into your clothes that are still slightly warm from just being warn. It was snowing outside, ever so slightly. One delicate snowflake floated through the air, hitting the ground just as the next one caught your eye.
It was a three day drive home. And the second I crossed state lines, into Wyoming, I already missed Montana. As the highways turned to freeways, and the cars crowded the streets, as the chain stores and restaurants became more and more prevalent as I traveled south, I noticed houses crowding the hillsides, and I was aware that I made the right choice in deciding to move to Montana. The fourth largest state in the country, with a population around the size of San Francisco. Life is more spacious out there. And as I was thinking about this, I wondered how it ever was that I lived in Los Angeles. Or the San Francisco bay area.
When I arrived in California, it was a warm, 80 degree day. The three layers I had had on from the previous day were peeled off and I slipped back into a tank top and shorts, an outfit that I was much more comfortable in. I had my whole life to discover this outfit, and only a handful of instances to wear snow clothes. The shock of being back only lasted for an hour or two before I was right back into the swing of things, weaving through traffic and wearing a sweater when the weather changed to a brisk 75 degrees.
I’ve had a lot of opportunity to change my mind about moving; the weather is gorgeous here, I’ve been having fun, been going to my local spots, seeing my old friends, spending time with my family, and settling into the comforts of familiarity. Plus, it seems that every person likes to remind me how cold it is in Montana, as if I haven’t already thought of that.
But I’m not budging. I don’t care how cold it is…I’ll survive. I don’t care how far away it is…they have an airport. I don’t care how few people I know there…the people I already know are great and I will undoubtedly meet new friends. I don’t care how different it is…actually, I do care…that’s part of the reason I’m going. The sound of the state on my lips sounds lovely to my ear, and I’m going no matter what anyone thinks. I’ll buy a jacket and boots and it’ll be an adventure.
I’m scared, but I’m excited. Looking forward to trying something new. And having a closet. Unpacking my things in storage. Building community. And maybe I’ll join a band again, or take up cross-country skiing. Or maybe I’ll learn to make soup or bake pies. As far as I’m concerned, I get to build my life exactly the way I want at this point in time. I might hate it out there, and be embarrassed and come home, but I might fall in love. And I’ll never know until I try.
So three cheers for trying, eh?
And with that, some gratitude. It’s Friday, ya’ll. The time where we get to think of all the things in our lives we are grateful for, and then share them with each other. I’ll go, then you go.
I’m grateful for:
My playful, silly, kind grandma. Fresh fruits and veggies. Warm blankets. All the Montana people that are taking me under their wings to usher me in. Cuddling. The look on my dog’s face when he gets to run as fast as he wants across an open field. Puns. The amazingly supportive and wonderful friends in my life. Excitement. G-Chats with Nat. My bestie. Nail polish. Daydreaming. Feeling close to something life-changing. All of the people I met on travels. Serendipity. Music that moves. Old friends. Life, itself. Good hair days. Love and support from afar.
You feeling scared right now? On the verge of something big and different? Don’t cry alone in fear. Cry with the rest of us Wildhearts, who are doing the same thing. Let the Wildheart Revolution support you. By being a member you have access to an entire community dedicated to helping you live the exact life you want to be living. There is BIG NEWS happening very soon about the Revolution, so make sure you’re on the list to get notified the second the news is revealed.
Now your turn. Leave a comment below with the things you are grateful for today. And share with me something that you’re proud of trying lately. And while you’re thinking, please enjoy some pics from my week. Readyyyyyy…GO.
YES!!! You’re doing it!! You will never regret taking this leap. Even if Montana isn’t your ultimate destiny, who you are becoming in the process of leaping IS leading you towards your most magnificent self. You can always trust that – even when it gets really cold and it seems there are no more layers to add – like the bulbs that are planted in autumn, you can TRUST your uniquely wonderful self is fixin’ to blossom in the Spring time. They’ll only blossom if there’s a good, hard freeze though. Remember that!
Today I’m grateful for Skype, colleagues in cottages on fjords, snow on the trampoline, gorgeous fall colors, honest conversations, risking my heart, strong coffee, and hair that doesn’t ALWAYS look like crap. ;)
Miss Helen…this post gave me CHILLS. You are the absolute best with your metaphors and I so appreciate all your encouragement. I feel the same way. i don’t know if it’s my final destination, and I don’t care because that isn’t the point. The point is the experience and (like you said) who I’m becoming because of it. SO FUN!!!! EEEEEEEEE!
I love your gratitude list. It’s so visual. I’m imagining you chatting with your cottage-living colleagues on Skype while looking out your window at the frost covered trampoline, catching a glance of your hair in the mirror. Lovely. :)
See Sally? Already getting used to the cold, and making your way east (not that you could go further WEST, unless you happen to be a relative of the Sub-Mariner). I vote for you to keep travelling west, and make your way to Chi-CAH-go. Plenty of people need coaching, and my girl does have a thing for poochies. I’d take you to one of the shows I run!
Well, my dear…I have a buncha friends who have been trying to get me to come out to Chicago for awhile now. And since I’ll be stationed somewhere, it’ll be easier to travel. So…OK!! You better get the roll-out bed ready. :)
Everything is already prepared, my dear. I have a BIG place now. Living room or my office? Hmm…better make it the living room…my office tends to be occupied for long periods of time…you’d get more privacy in the living room than anywhere else!
You are ready to start your Montana adventure and you couldn’t have picked a better place! I am so excited for you! It get’s cold, but that’s what funky scarves are for. The snow falls so beautiful and the mountains remind you daily why you moved there. I am so happy you are doing this!
I am grateful for the time spent in Bozeman and all the wonderful people there–and now you are there too! I am also grateful for family, being able to learn my life lessons on my own and at my own pace, and cuddling, Fall spices, and sunshine!
Lately, I have been challenging myself to live in the present and cherish today. It is difficult, but always worth it.
Safe travels back to your new home–Montana.
Hey Miss Nik! Gosh you have been so absolutely supportive and encouraging during this whole decision and it means so much to me. Thank you. I noticed the same thing with the mountains when I was there last…being in that valley, surrounded by that beauty is unlike anything else. So amazing. Hook me up with any of your cool peeps that are there and definitely come visit!
I hear you about being present. It’s such an important thing, yet sometimes a difficult practice to incorporate to our daily lives. Congrats for trying! And keep me posted on how it’s going.
Mad love, back atcha.
I’m SOOOO excited for you. Living in a place with seasons is awesome and Montana is so beautiful. I always think you should follow your heart and if you are being drawn to Montana there is definitely a reason. You will have an amazing time and hopefully Tommy and I can visit???
I’ve lived in a lot of different places and I’ve never regretted trying something new. Take lots of pictures!!!! Love! XOXOXOXOXO
Thank you thank you thank you! And I agree with following your heart. Thank you for all your love and support all these years. Come visit!
I’m grateful that you are an adventurer with love and kindness in your heart. I love your courage to move to Montana, where we all came from…back to our American homeland. I am so excited for you!
I love you, mom!
There was frost on everything this morning……but now its sunny. Don’t forget to get those boots and coat we talked about…..
Yes sir. I might bring you along for the shopping situation.
When I was 23 I was experiencing my first true, grown-up, recognizable growing pains…both emotionally and career-wise. One day I was frustrated enough to have a garage sale, pack a trunk and move to Minneapolis without a job (I’d already lived in Oregon, Washington and Monterey). I had one friend there & a few relatives on my dad’s side I didn’t know very well.
Well, I walked into a gold mine that bolstered my career to new heights, I made TONS of friends & contacts, many of whom I’m still in touch with, and I survived FIVE Winters! (That being said, I’d like to encourage you, fellow Cali girl, to take someone with you when purchasing Winter clothing, etc. The difference between what YOU think will keep you warm and what they KNOW will keep you warm will astound you! lol!)
I always encourage my friends to take a risk, move, have new adventures…don’t just wonder about it.
My favorite saying in life: EVERYTHING is temporary.
This week I’m grateful for having the rare (positive) opportunity to have no work schedule and living life like I never have before. Friends that “hook you up” without you even having to ask. Being able to do the same for them. Having someone you love enough to want to still kiss even though they have a cold. Looking forward to…well, actually just looking forward! With a big smile on my face!
Good luck with the move, darlin’ (get going before the highways & passes get treacherous!). And if you need anyone to drive back with you, I volunteer!
As always, follow your heart but take your brain along for the ride.
I love posting stuff because I know you will comment back with something even more lovely and thought provoking and inspiring. Thank you for all your wisdom. I will definitely not go shopping alone. :)
I’m grateful for things that sparkle (how could anyone not be?), the ability to paint and draw, my family, my history, the fact that I am the Magic I use to look for, and no matter what happens today, I’m still awesome, I am in charge of my life and my thoughts, and of course I am grateful for you.
Oh hells yeah lady, “I am the Magic I use to look for, and no matter what happens today, I’m still awesome, I am in charge of my life and my thoughts.” That is so beautifully said and I totally agree. What an amazing thing to realize. You rock, per usual.
I am so grateful for my health and long life ahead. I’m so glad I’ve started to learn to ask for help even if it means calling someone up and having a breakdown (I usually hold back if the person is “busy” and don’t choose to be “selfish”). I’m also grateful for R&B by LUSH which makes my hair look amazing. I’m grateful for my new-found ability to have fun on my own and as of most recently, I really dig my life. I used to fear every single moment alone and never relish in it. I’m grateful for money and opportunities and travel and a world that is always changing because even though it drives me nuts, I know I will never be stuck or without hope for long. Loads of love to you Sally!
Hey Monica…wow your list is really amazing. And thank you for sharing. I especially love that you recognized that you needed to reach out and not retreat. I’m a master at that too and it’s hard in the moment but always so worth it. Heck yes lady! I’m grateful for you!