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Motley Crue. And Being Scared/Excited For New Adventures.

I can’t get out of bed. Reframe…I don’t want to get out of bed. Because that means I have to face the day.

I woke up early this morning. About the time that the sun was coming out and immediately felt all of my emotions, from the past two months, rush to my face. I tried to stop the flood, but ultimately couldn’t and so I cried and cried.

Today marks the end of something and the beginning of something else. The end of life as I know it up to this point. A collection of all the people and things and places that have been, and I’m embarking on another adventure, whose destination is unknown.

I did this before, last year, when I put all my stuff in storage, and got in an RV to travel around the country. It was exciting and scary and I had a partner in crime. Natalie, my dog, and I went on this journey together. And while this next adventure might look similar in path and vehicle (road trip…some sort of auto), everything else is different.

I’m alone. I don’t know where I’m going to go. And this time, there is someone that I love, back at home, that isn’t coming with me, and may or may not be the right fit for me and may or may not be there when I get back. This changes the game.

And yet, I feel called to go. I know it’s right. I imagine myself driving down the open highway with the wind in my hair, the sun shining ahead, watching the flowers in the fields to my right sway in the wind and the puffy white clouds of the Wyoming sky envelop my entire being. I imagine cool nights and big trees. I imagine being scared but exhilarated. And dipping my toes in rivers and starting campfires and reading books and twirling around in a beautiful field somewhere.

I don’t know where I’ll end up, I don’t know what will happen. All I know is I’m going, and that it needs to happen. And I want it to. And it starts today. So send me some love. Although I’m really excited, I’m also scared out of my mind. I’m sad to leave Mr. B, and the comfort of his care. I’m worried that I will be lonely out there or that it’ll be scary. I wonder how it’s all going to turn out and where I’ll be by the end.

And this is the stuff of life. Big, exhilarating ideas, urges to do things, and then the fear that comes along with it. The tears that say both “I don’t wannnnnnna go” and “I am so thrilled to go.” We never know how it turns out. We just have to follow the spark and know that we end up where we need to. And become who we’re supposed to.

I can’t thank you enough for reading. For being a part of my journey. For loving and caring and living your OWN life in a way that’s exciting/scary and sparked. You inspire me.

So before I pack, get in my car, and start driving, I created this little video. A collection of pics from the time I got back from my last RV trip in January, to now. A visual marker of the last six ish months. To remember and appreciate. I can’t wait to take you all along for the ride this time around. Sending you all hugs and kisses.

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22 Responses to Motley Crue. And Being Scared/Excited For New Adventures.

  1. Way to have me bawling early in the morning beoo. Man it IS a lot to handle in one body huh all of these whirlwind of emotions us as human beings are capable of. I was thinking last night after our hang out, how not only is it so wonderful to have someone amazing like you who gets it and will always understand where I am at, but that you truly are a mirror. I see in you SO MUCH love and beauty and your sweet, tender, giving heart. Also was musing on how life is so beautiful that you can fall in love with people all over again, regardless of anything that has come before or may after. :) Love you dude. I am so unbelievably happy for you and proud of you. For taking the road less traveled, for venturing out when you don’t know what the end result may look like, let alone anything along the path in between. You inspire me. I am there with you in spirit (and via text message and gChat. haha). LOVE YOU!! xoxo

    • Sallyhope says:

      I think I’m going to bring a cardboard cutout of you to go in my passenger’s seat. It’ll be weird to not have you physically there, but your adventurous spirit is what has allowed this whole spirit in me to come out last year. Thank you for being so inspiring and being your lovely self. I love you dude.

  2. Michael says:

    Sometimes, the only thing you have is the notion, no, the gut, that now is the time. Sally Hope, be blessed. If you get to Austin, TX, let me know.

  3. Cheryl says:

    So amazed by how brave you are – and all you’ve accomplished. I love LOVE reading your blogs, almost always cry! I can not wait to see the adventures that come your way this time around! :)

    • Sallyhope says:

      Cheryl…you’re going to make ME cry! It means so damn much to me to have you here, week after week, following along and supporting. I so appreciate all that you are. THANK YOU!!! And please let me know how I can ever help you.

  4. I think there are a lot of times when we don’t want to get out of bed, or do whatever. For me, a lot of the time, it’s exercise. It’s just so damn easy to say, “Oh, I’m too tired”, or “I’m too busy”, or something else, but in the end, it’s “I’m too full of my own crap”. You push on. Discipline. A big part of discipline and what makes successful people successful is pushing on. Pushing on when the odds are against you. Pushing on when you don’t want to. Pushing on when it’s easier not to.

    The other day, I knew I had to go to my storage. Not to get out something that sold. No, it was just to do what I DIDN’T do at my previous storage, which is get it organised and get everything on shelving in some way that will make life vastly easier to get a full and complete inventory of everything (the other thing I DON’T want to do — inventory). I was quite comfy at home, just reading books, or watching some videos or whatever. I didn’t really want to strip down to my running gear and go run to storage. Especially since I would have to carry not just water, but more keys (the keys to the condo, and the keys to the two separate locks on my storage), and a small bag to hold it. I don’t like extraneous gear when I run. However, in the end, I did it. I got in about 4-5 hours there, felt like there was something accomplished (never enough to satisfy me!), and then went for a burger and beer at Red Robin after (walking to the restaurant and back, too!).

    I’m about to most likely embark on going on the road on a semi-steady basis again, and while this time, my responsibilities are expanded (not only do I just sell merch and promote the shows, but I’m going to be responsible for all filming and distribution, and also pitch in with booking ideas from time to time, when asked), it’s also a big step (and a scary one, even though it’s a “good”, forward step for the company. This means, I’ll have to actually hire people to film and edit and compile a glass master for me, and pay them, and get new software and hardware to accommodate filming and distribution, which all costs a lot of money. However, the butterflies are moderately dispelled by the fact that this is where we’ve always wanted to go as a company – production AND distribution. There’s more money in production than straight distribution, and it makes sense to go there.

    Yes, there’s a lot of tense moments, but again, the reason successful people are successful is because we take those risks, the risk of getting out of bed in the morning, and embarking on these new journeys, these new destinies.

    Part of my journey has been the personal journey I took a year and a half ago when I first started seeing my lady after coming to terms with the fact that I would likely be alone for my life and being comfortable with it. Then she enters the picture and everything changes all over again with a new destiny that now includes her.

    • Sallyhope says:

      Thank you again for sharing your story. You are so inspiring!! I love your determination and I especially love it when you talk about your lady. AWWWWWWWW. I appreciate you!!!!

  5. Angela says:

    Sally Hope,

    Thank you for sharing such real stuff… I so admire your courage and determination to live “you.”– Very inspiring, indeed… as per usual when I read your words each and every week. Thank you…

    Here’s to your next adventure. Can’t wait to read whats in store for you… Nothin’ but the best.

    Big love–

    Angela

    • Sallyhope says:

      Hey Angela…thank you so much for saying all of that. Sometimes I freak out after I hit publish. “Did I share too much?” etc. So it means a lot to have you speak to that. Thank you so much for reading and being a part of this whole thing. I hope that you are doing well. Don’t ever hesitate if you ever need anything more than just a blog post.

      So much love!
      Sally

  6. The things that scare you the most often give the most reward once conquered. Go dip your toes in those wild rivers and embrace the free spirit that you are!! #jelly

    • Sallyhope says:

      You are SO right. And I will do those things. And if you get a wild hair to meet up with me, send the bat signal. :)

  7. Girl, you are so on the cusp of something big. I am so proud to be your friend and a witness to all things amazing that Sally Hope is creating.

    xo

    • Sallyhope says:

      Thank you lady. I feel the same way about you. I am loving watching your journey as well. Thanks for all the love and support.

  8. Vanety Fabrick says:

    as always, i am inspired . . . though i still let fear hold me back in so many ways, i’m working on it . . . it is always good to know i’m not the only one feeling what i’m feeling . . . and when we share what we are going through, we motivate one another, and we don’t feel so alone . . . lots of love to you and all the best on your adventures!

    • Sallyhope says:

      That is SO true…about the sharing. It’s so easy to sit here all alone and scared and not say anything. I’m so glad I did because your guys’ love and support has been so incredibly wonderful and helpful. And yes…we’re all in it together. Here to love and support each other. I’m here for YOU lady. Please let me know how I can support you even more.

      Much Love

  9. Your spirit of adventure is flat out infectious! I have MAD respect for you girl. Going after the unknown, chasing freedom, finding yourself along the way. It’s magical and I am so, so proud of you!
    Send me instagram postcards from the road!! :)
    LOVE. YOU.
    xo

    • Sallyhope says:

      Thank you so many muches for being a part of the WHOLE ride. Geez…you met me right at the beginning. For both of us I think. So excited to be adventuring with you. :) And you KNOW I’ll be blowing up the instasphere.

      LOVE YOU BACK.

  10. Jen Kem says:

    You are brave.
    Glorious.
    Adventurous.
    And loved.

    Thank you for always being transparent and sharing your freedom quest with us. And, have a fucking awesome time.

    xo
    Jen

    • Sallyhope says:

      Girl….THANK YOU!! For the love and the cheerleading. Just cause you said it…I AM gonna have a fucking awesome time. BOOM!!!!

  11. Violet says:

    Love and blessings to you on your journey! You are so courageous and true – way to embrace it all with open arms and full heart <3

    xoxo,
    V

    • Sallyhope says:

      Miss Violet my darling. I was just thinking of you this weekend as I was assisting Synergy (In The Bones). Remembering how wonderful sharing those times with you were. Remembering walking in the class and sitting right next to you. What an amazing experience. And it’s been so absolutely wonderful to see us both grow. Thank you for continuously supporting and loving me throughout these journeys. Perhaps I will make it out your way on this trip. I will DEF keep you posted if that’s the case.

      So much love!
      S

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