March 15th, 2011
It’s The Journey, Not The Michael Jackson
When I was 23 I felt like I was a mess. I didn’t know “what I wanted to do with my life,” I felt like I SHOULD know “what I want to do with my life” (I mean…I was 23 after all…an adult and shit), and knew that what I felt like what I wanted to do at that given moment shouldn’t be an acceptable enough option. Because really, all I actually wanted to do was be in a rock n roll band, work at a cool clothing store where I could have crazy hair and piercings and listen to loud music, and bartend in the coolest bar in town. But yet, I felt like none of that was acceptable (obviously…I had JUST graduated college with Honors and wrote a major thesis in sexuality). I felt like I should be planning for my REAL career. For my REAL life. For my REAL future. And from what I felt like doing, how possibly was any of that stuff ever going to turn me into a bonafide business bitch?
So I spent most of my time feeling uneasy. Inside. In my chestal area. I cried to my mom. I drank a lot of beer. I stressed out. I read books about the Quarter Life Crisis. I had no idea how it was all going to work out.
But, even though I had all this unease, I just kept going, the way I wanted to go. Which was: Rock n Roll Band. Bartend. Awesome Clothing Store. KILLER Hair (always). Creative Outfits. Partying. Having A Blast.
That time is one of my most favorite times of my life. I had so much fun. I felt so free. I learned about my own power and creativity. Developed a brand new, confident self and became a rocker superstar. I learned shit I would never have known would be important, like how to set up a PA (which has come in handy for my Girls Rock school program), or how to pour the perfect bloody mary, or how to fit ANYONE in the perfect sized jeans, or how to run a business, or how to network with the people that count. I stretched, grew, jumped out of my comfort zone, flew. All of that was so unbelievably valuable for me now…the foundation of the girl you see today. But back then, I just couldn’t foresee any of it. Had I plopped myself in a “real” and “acceptable” job at the time, I would not be here today, talking to you. I believe that. And I’d have no fun stories to share.
We all know that hindsight is 20/20…shit makes sense after the fact. And had I known then, what I know now, I might have had less chestal palpatations. But what I’ve learned, and what I keep learning, and what I hope my clients learn is that EVERYTHING we do at every stage of the game is all part of the bigger picture, the bigger plan. It ALL makes sense later. It’s all part of the important journey that gets us where we need to go. It’s what MAKES us good at our (super fun, sparkly) jobs later on. Those experiences are priceless. And there is no such thing as a wrong decision if you just keep following what feels right, next. If it doesn’t feel right, it isn’t, so don’t do it. If it does feel right, even though it feels risky and you may feel lost, it’s still right. So do it.
So you must just keep following where your heart and gut and chestal area wants to lead you. Don’t push it. Don’t fight it. Go with it. If your gut says rock n roll…you better rock your ass off. If your gut says Peace Corps…then do that. If your gut says move to New York and start a clothing line, do that. You can’t make a mistake. Everything you do matters to who you become, so just keep going. You ARE your business, so the more life you live, the better off your business will be. And even though scariness will always be there (troof), I hope you find some sense of ease knowing that the scary things are almost always the ones that make the most sense in hindsight.
You got it boo. Go with it.
And speaking of going with it, here is a video showing a bunch of skills I never would have learned had I not done whatever I wanted to in my 20’s. The song is from my first band, Titsofrenix. I’m the one shredding on guitar and singing harmonies.
I wanna know ALL about your experiences with this, your journey, your hindsight 20/20 moments. Leave a comment to share with us here, then pass it along to your peeps.
YEAH GIRL!!!! Love the kick-ass rockstar moves. This is a great post. The journey is IT. More important than even the destination. Thanks for the great reminder to live in the moment and follow your heart! YAY!!!
P.S. Coach = ridiculous. Love!
Hahhahahah! Thanks girl. I’m ridic. And YES…it’s so hard to remember that the journey is the point when we’re so stressed trying to figure out where the journey is going to take us. Simple reminders, I suppose. :-)
Saaaaally! You are so badass! Haha omg if I had known about you in my 14yr-old music phase I would have fangirled alllll over you…. good thing I can still do it now :D :D
Thanks for the reminder that I should live a little crazy right now! (Says girl who just spent all day volunteering at the animal shelter.. yeah haha)
Girl!!!!!! I freakin LOVE you and happily welcome any kind of fangirling coming from you. YES! Live it up. Do what you want. Do what feels right. Keep doing what you’re already doing and just know that it all is part of the bigger picture. girlfriend, I’m so excited for you. I wanna voice chat with you very soon.
Hard to believe we’ve known each other for 25 years! Just want to say how proud of you I am and that your picture at the top of your website is beautiful! So natural and fresh! Keep doing what you are doing! xoxo
Hey girl!! I KNOW!!! I was JUST thinking about that the other day. Thank you for stopping by my site and leaving such a sweet comment. I love that even though we haven’t seen each other in years, we’re still present in each other’s lives. Awwwww
Sally, you ARE a bonafide business bitch!!! I love that!! I feel everything you said, I went to law school, not knowing what I REALLY wanted out of life. But no regrets because my years working at “the firm” helped lay a solid foundation of skills so that hopefully I will also be a bonafide business bitch!! Love you!!
Yeah girl! Totally. No such thing as wasted time. Everything matters. AND, you already ARE a bonafide biz bitch. Love you too!