When I was 23 I felt like I was a mess. I didn’t know “what I wanted to do with my life,” I felt like I SHOULD know “what I want to do with my life” (I mean…I was 23 after all…an adult and shit), and knew that what I felt like what I wanted to do at that given moment shouldn’t be an acceptable enough option. Because really, all I actually wanted to do was be in a rock n roll band, work at a cool clothing store where I could have crazy hair and piercings and listen to loud music, and bartend in the coolest bar in town. But yet, I felt like none of that was acceptable (obviously…I had JUST graduated college with Honors and wrote a major thesis in sexuality). I felt like I should be planning for my REAL career. For my REAL life. For my REAL future. And from what I felt like doing, how possibly was any of that stuff ever going to turn me into a bonafide business bitch?
So I spent most of my time feeling uneasy. Inside. In my chestal area. I cried to my mom. I drank a lot of beer. I stressed out. I read books about the Quarter Life Crisis. I had no idea how it was all going to work out.
But, even though I had all this unease, I just kept going, the way I wanted to go. Which was: Rock n Roll Band. Bartend. Awesome Clothing Store. KILLER Hair (always). Creative Outfits. Partying. Having A Blast.
That time is one of my most favorite times of my life. I had so much fun. I felt so free. I learned about my own power and creativity. Developed a brand new, confident self and became a rocker superstar. I learned shit I would never have known would be important, like how to set up a PA (which has come in handy for my Girls Rock school program), or how to pour the perfect bloody mary, or how to fit ANYONE in the perfect sized jeans, or how to run a business, or how to network with the people that count. I stretched, grew, jumped out of my comfort zone, flew. All of that was so unbelievably valuable for me now…the foundation of the girl you see today. But back then, I just couldn’t foresee any of it. Had I plopped myself in a “real” and “acceptable” job at the time, I would not be here today, talking to you. I believe that. And I’d have no fun stories to share.
We all know that hindsight is 20/20…shit makes sense after the fact. And had I known then, what I know now, I might have had less chestal palpatations. But what I’ve learned, and what I keep learning, and what I hope my clients learn is that EVERYTHING we do at every stage of the game is all part of the bigger picture, the bigger plan. It ALL makes sense later. It’s all part of the important journey that gets us where we need to go. It’s what MAKES us good at our (super fun, sparkly) jobs later on. Those experiences are priceless. And there is no such thing as a wrong decision if you just keep following what feels right, next. If it doesn’t feel right, it isn’t, so don’t do it. If it does feel right, even though it feels risky and you may feel lost, it’s still right. So do it.
So you must just keep following where your heart and gut and chestal area wants to lead you. Don’t push it. Don’t fight it. Go with it. If your gut says rock n roll…you better rock your ass off. If your gut says Peace Corps…then do that. If your gut says move to New York and start a clothing line, do that. You can’t make a mistake. Everything you do matters to who you become, so just keep going. You ARE your business, so the more life you live, the better off your business will be. And even though scariness will always be there (troof), I hope you find some sense of ease knowing that the scary things are almost always the ones that make the most sense in hindsight.
You got it boo. Go with it.
And speaking of going with it, here is a video showing a bunch of skills I never would have learned had I not done whatever I wanted to in my 20’s. The song is from my first band, Titsofrenix. I’m the one shredding on guitar and singing harmonies.
I wanna know ALL about your experiences with this, your journey, your hindsight 20/20 moments. Leave a comment to share with us here, then pass it along to your peeps.