January 13th, 2015
This week, something funny happened.
I realized that…I got what I asked for.
And you might be thinking “ok great…good for you…so what?” and that’s fair. I’d probably be thinking the same thing.
But in noticing that I got what I wanted (which if you remember one of my last blog posts I asked for “dual residencies in both Montana and California), I’ve also noticed that a ton of other unexpected things have shown up.
That is…what has happened in the aftermath of getting what I wanted, has been a whole new set of things to worry about and choices to make.
I giggle when I write this because I’m absolutely not complaining. Like “poor me! I got what I wanted and now I have choices…WAH!” but more like, I wondered how much this happens to ALL OF US.
The aftermath of the “ask” and the “get.” And the choices we are then left with when we get what we want.
Here’s an example:
I wanted dual residencies. And then less than two weeks later, I had the opportunity to have that. My awesome downtown apartment in Montana is still mine, and I found an awesome spot in California directly in the middle between two sets of my friends and all of my family.
The place is gorgeous, centrally located, well priced, furnished with all the things I need and extra fun bonuses like an entire garage (not that I have anything to put in it but still), a 42” flat screen TV, surround sound, and a washer and dryer. The house was also hand built by a Montanan wood-worker, so the entire thing is custom built with the most beautiful wood you’ve ever seen. It’s rad.
HOWEVER…what I didn’t think about when I was making my wish was that now I have two homes! Which means two sets of expenses. Two sets of rent, two gym memberships, two internet connections, two cars, two parking passes, two lives. And in order to maintain this for any amount of time, it’s bound to be more expensive than I’ve been used to. At least double, but actually more since Cali living isn’t quite as cost effective as Montana living.
Which leads me to choice. What should I do? Should I close shop in one place and combine all assets? Should I figure out a way to make more money so that it’s a non-issue? Should I rent out the other place while I’m not there?
And these questions rattle around in my brain all day long. And each day that goes by, is another day I haven’t decided. And when you don’t make a decision, your life is in limbo. You feel confused. You aren’t totally present anywhere because you’re focusing more on the “what ifs” and “what should I’s” then you are on enjoying the two new homes you just acquired. You’re not sure if you should buy a trash can and a broom, or wait until you make a decision and grab the ones you have from Montana.
And this led me to thinking about choice in general. About how every single day, from the second we wake up until the second we go to bed, our entire day is filled with a series of choices.
Some are small, like how many times to snooze or what to eat for breakfast, and some are big, like what direction to go in for your business or whether or not you want to stay in your relationship/your town.
I have noticed along the way, that a lot of people’s success is tied up in their ability to make beneficial choices for themselves.
And at this point you might be thinking…”well…that’s the problem. How do I know if it’s a good choice or a bad choice?” or “how do I CHOOSE and know I’m making the right decision?”
And you’re in the right place. Because I have a formula. And it’s fail-proof. But it does take some awareness on your part, so if you want it to work, you have to be super honest with yourself and your heart.
Here’s the formula: Decide what your goal is + make every choice you make and action you do point toward that goal. (tweet this!)
If it doesn’t point to that goal, then you don’t do it.
Here’s an example from my own life…
In this decision that I’m having to make right now, the choice is between keeping both places, or just having one.
And I’ve just realized that my biggest desire and goal right now is to have BOTH. To not have to choose between two things I love and want in my life.
So my decision then becomes… “Ok…whatever I do in regards to this, has to be in service of keeping both.”
The actions could be a variety of things like rent my place out to a sub-letter, rent it out as a vacation rental, or just make more money.
At this point, there is a new choice. The choice now is “which option to choose?”
So I can go back to the formula and start with my goals. What do I want now? Well…I want the most freedom. And second to that, I don’t want the double expense. I want to be able to come to both houses whenever I want and stay for as long as I want without hassle. Do I care if strangers stay in my house? I’m not sure yet. But since I’m playing with the idea I’m going to say no.
So the choice and option that gives me the most freedom and the opportunity to not have to pay double rent is renting it out as a vacation rental. That way I can choose the dates I want visitors in there, and have it for myself the rest of the time.
So as you can see here, the “right” choice for me is the one in which what I want, and what choice I’m making are aligned. (tweet this)
And here’s a fun video to explain this even further and to throw out a super fun challenge for you all!
Ready to practice this in your own life?! Below is a super fun exercise you can try. It is taken from the “Heartwork” (that’s “homework” for us Wildhearts) that I send out to the Wildheart Revolution Private community every week.
1) Think about what decision you are trying to make right now. It could be big or small. About anything.
2) Discover what you TRULY want and what your overall (big picture) goal is.
And I say “truly” because a lot of times we think we want certain things when really, what you want deep down is something else.
This is an important piece. Go to that place that knows your truth inside. And ask.
This can be a business goal, personal, life, etc.
3) Make a list of the actions that are in alignment with this goal
4) Choose it
5) Share your discoveries us here in the comments below.
Choice is a huge part of life. You could argue that it is one of the biggest parts of life in that nothing can happen without first making a choice. So here’s to all our choices and having all our choices make a beautiful impact on our lives.
And if you want even MORE discussion and personal help with this, or if you dig these exercises, you’re going to want to make SURE you’re part of the Wildheart Revolution when registration opens back up this month.
It is THE PLACE to be to learn how to make real changes in your life, with a group of dynamic and amazing Wildhearts, and three coaches at the top of the game who are hell bent on you getting the life you want.
Be the first to know alllllll about it by getting all up in the party right here.
Happy choice making and I look forward to hearing from you!