May 20th, 2016
When you complete something
Seven months ago, I was at my friend Wendy’s house, washing my hair at night so I didn’t have to wake up an extra 30 minutes early to my 3 am alarm that was to be going off in a few short hours from that moment.
Wendy’s house. The place where I moved to about ten years ago when a rock n roll band from LA plucked me out of my Santa Barbara life, and gave me the stage to bloom on.
The place where I lived until after the band broke up several years later. The place where I wrote and recorded my very first song. And where I grew from the girl who played the game of life, to the girl who was the conductor of the game of life.
So it’s not surprising to me that here I am, 7 months later, writing this to you from Wendy’s house. In my old room. A 250 square foot pool house, with views of the bird fountain, pool, trees, and spanish villa style courtyard.
It’s not surprising to me that on this day, another major moment is about to happen.
This weekend, I will graduate from my Kundalini Yoga training program. I will get recognized for all of my hard work, and my sweat and my tears. For all 7 trips back and forth to Santa Monica, the sleeping on couches, the waking up at 3 am to get to Sadhana on time, only to give it everything I got not to fall asleep during the whole thing.
For all the times I pushed through 30 more minutes of a yoga posture I thought I couldn’t do for one more second. For showing up even when I was sick, sad, upset, exhausted. For constantly putting myself out there even when I felt like I wanted to hide.
For learning, listening, singing. For learning a new language. For packing a lunch when I was on day 35 of a 40 day “eat only green foods” cleanse. For making a new soul sister friend. For sharing my tears when they showed up.
For becoming a yogi. For becoming the type of person who can no longer turn a blind eye to the truths inside myself. For becoming…a teacher. A vessel through which these teachings will now come through.
I will be recognized for completing something life changing and challenging. And it feels…amazing.
There have been so many things I’ve learned these past seven months. And learning about Kundalini is only one part of that.
I think when you learn something new, and are a complete beginner, you are humbled. And I was. Walking into the yoga studio seven months ago, felt like the first day in the dorms in college. Small fish in a very big and unfamiliar pond, without any fish friends to swim around with.
And then the more you swim, the more you know how to survive. And then you realize, that you’re actually a big beautiful fish after all, and that you always have been but never knew it.
Tomorrow, I will wake up at 3am. Put on my Kundalini white clothing (Kundalini yogis wear white to be “neutral” and also because white expands your auric radiance at least a foot according to some schools of thought), put my hair in a bun and a white head covering on. I will show up with no make-up, no matter how tired I look. I will get in the car and drive 45 minutes in order to make it to Sadhana in time at 4:45 am. I will be in Sadhana for two and a half hours. Chanting, meditating, and doing physical postures. I will then let the leaders take the day where it needs to go until 6 pm, including rolling burritos and feeding the homeless in downtown Santa Monica.
Sunday…I will graduate. In the presence of my fellow teachers and our loved ones and families. I will grab a certificate and look at it knowing that I just completed something I’m really really proud of.
Something that fed my soul, softened my edges, and made me even brighter and lighter than I was before. Something I committed to and stuck with.
It’s hard not to be a little sad that this chapter is over. There will never be another Level 1 teacher training for me. I will never again be required to do 2.5 hours of Sadhana in the morning for 21 days. I will never learn this stuff for the first time ever again.
I have no idea what’s next. But my heart is so full thinking about it. Thank you for reading these words and being on the journey with me. I imagine that there will be a lot of fun stuff that will come out of these trainings, but for today, I am sitting here in pride, and if nothing else ever comes of these trainings, that is good enough for me.
I did it. Congrats to me.
And what about you? Sometimes it’s the simple things that make the most difference in our lives. Are you trying a new morning routine? Are you completing something you’re proud of? Even if you’re not, I want you to find something and share it in the comments below.
Fill in the blank: “One thing I am proud of today is _______”
P.s. One of the next things I’m committing to is virtual online Kundalini yoga classes. It’s gonna be rad. Promise. Get on this list to make sure you’re in the loop when that goes live.
Congratulations! Sat nam! I signed up to get on your Kundalini classes list! Sounds amazing!
Hey Jill! OH YAY! That is so exciting. I’m so happy to have you there. Make sure to fill out the survey so I know what days and times work best for you!
So moved by what you wrote. Congratulations for a milestone of the heart and spirit.
So moved by you, always. Love you mom.
Congratulations Sally! Sometimes we have to get uncomfortable in order to achieve something we really want. You are an inspiration to me (and probably a lot of other people as well). Your certificate and graduation are well earned.
When talking about putting yourself outside your normal (safe) boundaries and pushing yourself, I would say earning my black belt in taekwondo is something I am very proud of, especially since I started training at the age of 34. I suffer from anxiety and having to test and perform in front of people brought on panic attacks. I eventually became an instructor and trained until I earned my 3rd degree black belt. Do I still suffer from anxiety? Yes. However, becoming a black belt was more important than staying within my comfort zone.
THANK YOU. Thank you for your feedback and encouragement and support. And also CONGRATS!!! That is so so wonderful about your black belt (the first and following ones!). Stories like yours really inspire me. It doesn’t matter how old we are or how scared we are, if we want something, we can make it happen with enough perseverance, heart, and tenacity. Congrats to YOU and your bright and bold move.
Wow! That’s amazing Kimberly! Thanks for sharing! How inspiring :)
Congrats Sally, such a wonderful accomplishment. Rejoice in closing this chapter, for it will open another magnificent one! <3 Positive vibes from Dublin!
Thank you SO SO much Tarsila!!! Mwah!
Congratulations Miss Sally .
One thing I am proud of today is having you in my life.
I hope to see you soon
You are SUCH a big part of this journey with me. Thank you for taking me under your wing at Solstice. Love to you soul sister.
So, so proud of you. Congrats on the achievement and the next level of your fulfilling life.
That just near made me cry. THANK YOU. It means the world to me to have you here.
You are forever and always an inspiration!
It is SO wonderful to hear from you. I smiled big when I read your name. Thank you for still being here with me after all these years and wild times under our belts. :)
Thank you so much for the comment. It hit my heart. <3
What I’m proud of today is knowing you–even though it’s just a little, and from a considerable distance.
Congratulations on your accomplishment, and on your ability to share yourself with both confidence and vulnerability. It’s(mostly)good to be a grown-up!
Congrats Sally!! Completing something like this changes you on a cellular level. You’re inspiring me to get back to my yoga roots.
One thing I’m proud of today is asking for what I want and thanking the universe for guiding me.
Dearest Awesomest Beautiful Sally needeless to say but I never get TIRED of saying how MUCH U inspire Me (AND MANY PEOPLE)
Today I am Proud of FINALLY STOPPED focusing in ALL the “bad & ugly” that has kept finding its way to my Life and INSTEAD I have decided to be TRULY Grateful & FIND & See all The Beauty that happens to be in My Life. I have decided to Enjoy “The Small & Big” Greatness.
Congratulations!! Your commitment & dedication to fulfilling your life is very admirable. Best wishes as your journey continues. So awesome!
Today I am proud that I took the first step towards becoming a CASA advocate (court appointed advocate for foster children).
Happy graduation! Can’t believe how quickly it came! Sharing your journey inspires me! Can’t wait till our kundalini online classes start! One thing I’m proud of is living with gratitude and feeling blessed to be here now!
I know, right? It feels like just yesterday we were in class talking about it. And now I’m all certified. You’re next. :)
CONGRATULATIONS! I can only imagine the determination this has taken to achieve this goal. You kick ass! xo
Thank you Breanna!! You know…it HAS taken a ton of determination. And dedication and devotion. And it was worth every moment of it. Thank you so much for reading and for chiming in.
Congratulations Sally! Blessings to you for honoring the celebration and the loss. You will never be a first time kundalini teacher trainee again. Everything worthwhile seems to always be a mix of joy and sadness.
Today, I am proud that I have spent the past year focusing on what I CAN do. I was quite ill in 2015. I was housebound and unable to work for 3 months. It is taking a long time to recover my energy. I still get help with household chores once a month.
And, despite the challenge, I have been able to slowly make progress on my one dream project that really means something to me. Starting my own business. And I’m doing it while honoring my current limits. Which I trust will make me and it stronger than we would have been otherwise.
Congratulations Sally, what a wonderful journey! :) x
Thank you so much Charlotte! It HAS been a wonderful journey!